Excessive Freetime Warning!

All day today Baglio, Joe, Dave Sam & I were discussing, as we often end up doing, what we would do with a ridiculous amount of money. My two plans, as vindictive as they may sound, are to steal the fire of other people's aspirations. First and foremost, if I'm super-celebrity wealthy, I want to buy every car that Baglio does just so his cars aren't unique or special. This train of thought led me to the idea of waiting until he purchases a really expensive car, which he invariablly will, a Ferrari or something, buying the same vehicle -- this is too elaborate to contain in one sentence. Then I wait for him to leave the house in a different car and park my Ferrari where he usually keeps his and push his around to the backyard or something. Then when he returns I wave and slam a baseball bat into the windshield as he lurches to a jaw-dropped stop and proceeds to lose it. Hopefully I'll be able to explain the prank to him before he, in his own words, hits me with a "buck shot." And yes, this entire plans involves me being so rich that the $250,000 price tag on the prank wouldn't bother me. The other plan, which I alluded to earlier, is to beat Kevin into space via an expensive, though possible, commerical space flight.

Much later in the day the general line of conversation was still very much present when Joe discussed the idea -- along the same vindictive lines as my ideas -- of purchasing an expensive piece of art directly from an artist and proceeding to destroy it immediately, right in front of the creator. For whatever reason this thought inspired Baglio to express his desire to destroy the Sistine Chapel by exploding off its roof. For several minutes we discussed various methods of accomplishing such a difficult undertaking, considering the extreme security of the building and Vatican City itself.

Hours later, literally, we came to the solid conclusion that the best possible method of destroying the Sistine chapel was this:

1. A small airforce of helicopters is smuggled into Paris on trucks and hidden in various warehouses throughout the city. Simultaneously several large armoured vehicles with high-powered cranes are positioned in the areas surrounding the Washington monument in D.C.

2. The GO-code is sent out and the helicopters lift off and head for the Eiffel Tower where they drop numerous chains and things of that nature to pull the tower out of its foundation and into the air.

3. Authorities are contacted and the demands are given. If the U.S. government doesn't allow the trucks located in Washington to approach the Washington monumented unmolested then the Eiffel Tower will be dropped on a heavily populated portion of Paris.

4. Assuming the demands are met the Washington trucks proceed to the monumenet and raise their cranes to cover the massive "erection" with an equally massive condom. At the same time the Eiffel Tower is transported to Vatican City under the cover of the witty distraction.

5. The helicopters maneuver the tower upsidedown, light it on fire, and drop it through the roof of the Sistine Chapel. Immortalizing all those involved forever and ever.

We realized that the helicopters would probably be shot down as soon as they reached open ground and determined it would probably be safter to drop the tower on the Louvre since it's in Paris too. We figured that was good enough and it was pretty late by then anyway. We thought, in the end, it may be easier and cheaper to purchase a stealth bomber and just drop a payload of explosives on it -- but whatever floats your boat. It's not nearly as stylish that way.